Roxanne’s Story: Class of ‘?’ Graduating in four (or more) years
Meet Roxanne
Roxanne grew up on the southeast side of Chicago and proudly identifies as a Peruvian trans woman. She graduated from her neighborhood high school and was a part of the International Baccalaureate Diploma Program. Roxanne is the first in her family to graduate high school and college. She took a 5 year track to graduate with her bachelors at Chicago public institution in 2022. Currently, Roxanne works remotely as a customer service representative.
Roxanne’s Path to College
Growing up, Roxanne struggled to have the space to explore her passions. For most of her life, she lived in a three-bedroom apartment with seven people cycling in and out. “So privacy was a rare luxury and exploring my gender identity and sexuality was something I could only do while outside of my own home.” Her family, however, was dedicated to education and often asked Roxanne, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Roxanne said, “This question always haunts me. To shut everyone up and leave me alone about the topic, I kind of just said, ‘Doctor.’ That was very much a bold lie. I didn’t even know what I wanted to do because I just wanted them to stop asking me about it.” Although Roxanne alleviated some of her family’s pressure, she still struggled to have support to think about her future.
Roxanne attended a private Catholic high school until she transferred to her neighborhood school and enrolled in the International Baccalaureate Diploma Program during her junior year. During this time, Roxanne was exploring her independence and meeting new people. When it came time to apply to colleges, Roxanne applied to the same schools as her friends. As university admissions offices sent out letters, she was confused about which school to pick, so she went for guidance at a college preparatory program. The program connected Roxanne with an advisor who helped her and her mom understand her financial options with the different bachelor’s degree granting institutions on a four year track. This led her to enroll in a public school in Chicago to pursue her bachelor’s. She expected to graduate in less than four years since she had acquired enough credits through her IB diploma to start college as a sophomore.
Roxanne’s College Journey
In her journey to college Roxanne talks about how much her personal challenges rocked her entire academic experience. As Roxanne was breaking free from an unhealthy relationship she withdrew from her classes during the fall semester of her 2nd year. “It was around the time that I switched my major to biology and I just couldn’t function really. So I just decided to leave my academics alone for that semester. I needed to have a minimum of six credit hours to keep an on campus job, so I just dropped the whole semester at the very last minute so that I could keep working.” Doing this helped Roxanne keep her on campus job and protect her GPA. After withdrawing, she didn’t tell anyone about her decision and simply continued to work and went back to classes the following semester.
“It was around the time that I switched my major to biology and I just couldn’t function really. So I just decided to leave my academics alone for that semester. I needed to have a minimum of six credit hours to keep an on campus job, so I just dropped the whole semester at the very last minute so that I could keep working.”
Throughout the rest of the year, Roxanne was stressed about finding a major right for her. She felt lost and tired. As a commuter student with an on-campus job, she was on campus for over 12 hours for days back to back. She was very intentional with her time and mentioned that she met with several different advisors until she found one she connected with. While meeting with this advisor, she learned about a new major, human resources. At first, Roxanne was hesitant about the major, but in 2019 she reluctantly switched majors. At this point, her sole focus was on graduating, she didn’t feel she had capacity to explore different majors.
While Roxanne was entering this new phase in her academic career, she was also continuing to do self-exploration. “It was the year when I started adapting more to myself. Like growing as a person because, I’ll be very honest, I didn’t really know how to properly be by myself.” This exploration sparked Roxanne to start experimenting with makeup. After some time and self reflection she found herself feeling comfortable with her feminine expression. She began to embrace her gender and began to identify as a woman.
“It was the year when I started adapting more to myself. Like growing as a person because, I’ll be very honest, I didn’t really know how to properly be by myself.”
Although Roxanne celebrated her new identity development, she was also worried about her safety on campus and at home. Looking back on the past, she is grateful for the support she currently has from her family. “It’s just nice to be able to express who I am without feeling like my family’s going to push me away or throw me away or say, or disown me or which is the biggest fear in any queer kids’ life is like being disowned by their family.”
Academic Pivots: 4 years turning into 5 years
Roxanne continued to grow as a person and began to develop her leadership skills. She stepped up into her first leadership position as president of the society’s human resource management club. She was excited for the opportunity, but then March of 2020 hit. “We didn’t even have any events planned because nobody could figure out what we needed to do. When we did have an event plan, it was only the special guest that came and like one or two people out of the 30,000 students in that university came.” It left her feeling defeated and apathetic about exploring life or her passions outside of classes.
During the pandemic, Roxanne noted that switching to online classes helped her stay in school. “It was the only beneficial thing for me academically because of how easily accessible my resources to school, to classes were and being home for that time. If it wasn’t for online school, I probably would’ve gotten kicked out.” Even then, navigating school was still challenging, as keeping up with her classes took a heavy toll on her mental health.
In 2021, Roxanne was eager to meet with her advisor to discuss graduation. “I thought it would be a nice, sweet, sexy four years. Then, I switched my majors a few times. So obviously, with every switch, it added a semester or two.” The meeting, however, did not go as planned.
“I thought it would be a nice, sweet, sexy four years. Then, I switched my majors a few times. So obviously, with every switch, it added a semester or two.”
“They told me, ‘You wouldn’t be graduating this semester. You have another class left to complete.’ And I was like, ‘I beg your pardon?” The class Roxanne needed was only offered once a year, so she would have to stay another year to take it. “I was so torn apart about it. Like, do I wanna spend all the money for that one class? I don’t even feel like I should be spending money. I was ready to drop out. I’m not gonna lie. I was ready to give up. They were like, ‘no, let’s not go there’. And I said ‘what other options do you see? Cause one costs money and the other doesn’t.’”
“‘I was ready to give up. They were like, ‘no, let’s not go there’. And I said ‘what other options do you see? Cause one costs money and the other doesn’t.’”
Her advisor walked Roxanne through her multiple options. Roxanne could not afford to take out personal loans to pay for one single class. Instead, they thought about staying enrolled for the whole school year so that she could remain eligible for FASFA and institutional financial aid. “I’d rather use FASFA money than my own money. I still had to pay tuition, but the monthly payment was far better than what one single class for a semester would’ve cost.” So, her advisor evaluated what courses Roxanne already completed and saw that she was already close to completing another minor, entrepreneurship. Since Roxanne would stay the year, she figured the bonus minor would make that extra year worth it.
When Roxanne’s cap and gown arrived in the mail, she immediately thought, “I don’t deserve this.” She was so burnt out, she did not have capacity to celebrate her graduation. “Due to the overall circumstances and everything that I was just dealing with internally, it was a very much a traumatic experience.” So, Roxanne decided not to attend her graduation.
“Due to the overall circumstances and everything that I was just dealing with internally, it was a very much a traumatic experience.”
A year after receiving her diploma, Roxanne still feels like she is still exploring who she is and her future. “I’m figuring things out at this moment in time.” She is excited for her younger sibling who is starting their journey in college and is hopeful they will have a better experience than she did.
What Roxanne Found Helpful
Having the option to meet with different advisors: “At my school you can schedule an appointment with any advisor that’s under your major. So I chose the one that I liked more, who was always sweet and kind to me and gave me the actually good options.” For Roxanne, it was important to discuss major academic decisions with advisors she trusted. Having the flexibility to meet with different advisors helped her find folks she could rely on, especially while navigating the financial, logistical and emotional barriers to graduating.
Knowing about “withdraws” and “incompletes” There were various points during Roxanne’s college journey where she was emotionally distressed and had no capacity to focus on her academics. Choosing to ‘withdraw’ and take an ‘incomplete’ allowed her to tend to her mental health while still persisting to her degree.
Roxanne’s Aspirations for the field:
- Universities should ensure that a required course for a major is offered multiple times a school year OR accept alternative courses. Roxanne was ONE class away from graduating. She took a whole extra year, which led to feeling burnt out by the time she graduated. She believes that universities should consider the emotional & financial strain students go through and be flexible to fulfilling major requirements.
- Universities should commit to creating a safe and welcoming environment for queer and trans people of color.For Roxanne, college was a time where she embraced her identity. She was both excited but also stressed on how her campus would welcome her. Looking back, she has this message for universities. “I need people to understand that the experiences for queer people are different. People of color, Black women, Black trans women, trans women in general. We suffer a lot of different things mentally. We suffer a lot of different things physically. it’s not always a safe environment for people. There are different microaggressions, especially for people of different backgrounds and races…I’m not asking for diversity training, but I’m asking for an understanding as to who we are as people.”
- Students deserve space & grace to explore themselves and their passions: College is a time where many students explore who they are and how they want to navigate their future. Roxanne was growing so much during her time in college and desperately wishes she didn’t feel so pressured to choose a career track without exploring her possibilities. “I wish I wasn’t forced to pick something out or keep telling myself ‘you’ll figure it out soon.’ I realized I’m not figuring it out soon. It’s taking forever…I would’ve just wanted to figure myself out first so I can learn what it was that I wanted to do.”